What is your edge? Where are you at the limit of what feels comfortable and where does this push into uncomfortable territory. I get transparent about a panic attack I had and what I learned:
- How do you know when you’re at your edge?
- Where is it in your body?
- What you can do to ride it out.
- How having grit can lead to endless opportunities
To learn more about Rebecca and listen to the full episode, go to https://rebecca-louise.com/blogs/podcast
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– TRANSCRIPT –
[00:00:00] Rebecca Louise: But someone starting something new, whether it’s a side hustle, a little business or something completely different, it’s that scarcity, but being in that discomfort zone is actually something that’s quite exciting.
[00:00:12] David Wood: Yes. How do you know you’re in the discomfort zone and also, why would you want to want to go into that?
[00:00:19] David Wood: I feel it in my body. I feel it as I feel the nerves, I feel maybe my belly gets tight and pinches a little bit. My. It goes a little faster. I had an experience three or four days ago where I actually had a panic attack. I, my, my landlord moved in downstairs, below my apartment, and I’ve been nervous about that for a few months.
[00:00:43] David Wood: And then he opened the adjoining door between his apartment and mine, and just came in and said, I’m just going to use the storage room hand. I know I was in disbelief. And, and, you know, I tried to set my boundaries and whatever, and he said, I’m not asking you, I’m just telling you, this is how it’s going to be.
[00:01:04] David Wood: I might, I’ve had anxiety for 20 years and I’m still managing it. And I went into my office and it was in such a state of agitation. So there’s an extreme version of how I know this is my discomfort zone. It might feel more mild for you. It might be just thinking about calling a prospect who might be a good client and asking them if they want to work with you, that might generate a few nerves.
[00:01:28] David Wood: If you imagine having a cold shower, a lot of people are doing that for all the health benefits scares me, you know, and the idea of getting into Boulder Creek. Now during the winter with all the snow on the ground and ice on the Creek, that really scares me. So what I’d say. Find those places you don’t have to confront them.
[00:01:50] David Wood: You don’t have to, you don’t have to quit your job and go cold Turkey into something else. You don’t have to go on a national gong show to promote your business. You don’t have to confess to your partner that you had an affair 10 years ago, then your broken agreement. You don’t have to do any of these things, but I highly recommend getting a sheet of paper and just writing at the top.
[00:02:12] David Wood: What would I do? If I was fearless, what would I say to people and to whom what would I do in my business? What would I do in my job? What would I ask for I’m I’m nervous right now. There’s a friend of mine, you know, I kind of want to ask him if he’d be a co-signer for a housing loan. Cause I could get the house that I want and he’s credits amazing.
[00:02:35] David Wood: I’m nervous, you know, that’s an edge for me. So just write down the things like what would you do if you were feeling don’t have to do all of them. You might circle two or three of the easier ones and go and do that as a, as practice to get into that discomfort zone. Now, why would you do it? I find that when I don’t do it, I feel like I’m playing small in life and I regret, I regret that I didn’t go.
[00:03:03] David Wood: If I do do it, I don’t always get what I want. I, you know, when I reached out to the owner and said, would you be open to a cup of tea in the garden with me? I couldn’t sleep. That was edgy for me. And I may not have got what gotten what I wanted, but transformed my life because we had an open, honest conversation.
[00:03:26] David Wood: I got to know him. I got to know how he built this house from scratch and fought tooth and nail. To make it, and some of the challenges he faces in his life. And then I was absolutely vulnerable about, I am miserable. I’m looking for a hotel. Is there any way you’d be willing to give me 24 hours notice before he come?
[00:03:47] David Wood: And he said, yeah, I could do that. I cried. So when I lean into it, I don’t always get what I want, but you might. And at least you can feel good about yourself that you went for it. And I want you to have that feeling of.
[00:04:04] Rebecca Louise: It’s so true. It’s having that, just going for it no matter what could be completely scary on the other side.
[00:04:11] Rebecca Louise: I appreciate you being so open and honest and vulnerable that you still suffer with anxiety and there’s still days where you’re like, I’m scared. Cause I feel like a lot of times. We see people who are super successful. We’ve liked, they’ve got their shit together. They’re all in line. There’s nothing that can get in their way.
[00:04:28] Rebecca Louise: They know what to do. And it’s like, I still get nervous. I still feel like that, but I want to do it anyway because I’m most scared of not going after it and not getting it then the fear itself. So for those of you who are listening out there and you guys know that sometimes when it is a little bit scary, It’s scary for everybody.
[00:04:48] Rebecca Louise: It’s not just because it’s happening to you. So I appreciate that you being open and honest there and being like for 20 years, I’ve struggled with anxiety and that’s okay. But you still done it anyway.
[00:05:00] David Wood: Exactly. I’m glad you said it. I want to pop the bubble. You know, we see people as successful. People might say, oh, David, you sold $300,000 from the stage in 15 minutes.
[00:05:11] David Wood: Oh my God. You’ve got everything worked out or. Jack Canfield wrote the forward to your book. That’s amazing that you, that you know him, like how do you hang out with Marianne Williamson and presidential candidate? Not recently, but, you know, I did ask her if she was single turns, turns out it was complicated, but they look at that and just assume these people have got it all together.
[00:05:34] David Wood: You know, maybe Joe Biden’s got it all together. My garden. I’ve been struggling. You know, I had trauma as a kid and sometimes my life is cruisy and easy and incredibly blessed and privileged. And in other ways, this weekend was miserable for me. I was like, how am I going to cope with what’s happening in my body?
[00:05:56] David Wood: I called the police. I said, what are my rights? And can you assist. They sent someone out and he said, yeah, maybe I can mediate something. And it helped. And, and, you know, I was once talking to John Gray who wrote Mars and Venus. And he said, something that blew me away is we were all sitting in his living room and he said, I really want to acknowledge you because being an entrepreneur is hard.
[00:06:25] David Wood: It’s really hard. And I just want to acknowledge you. And we want students, we were peers sitting around. He’s like, I don’t like this is John Gray. Who’s sold more books than maybe the Bible I had. Haven’t looked up the numbers, but I’m I’m I go through it often in my life places. I don’t know if I can get through it.
[00:06:46] David Wood: Sometimes I’ve gone and done. Iowasca wow. Not for the faint of heart that plant medicine, six hours of suffering. Recently, there’s an experimental program in, in Boulder where you do therapy sessions and they inject you with anesthetic. So you, you know, you’re not just there with all your faculties.
[00:07:06] David Wood: You’re like very in a vulnerable state and you see what your psyche wants to spit out, not for the faint of heart. So it takes grit. That’s, that’s the summary. It takes grit to live your life and it takes grit for some people. I just show up each day and to just work on their business or show up for their job or make money to put food on the table.
[00:07:32] David Wood: And I have such respect for for those people who just dig into that grit. And they’re like, all right, I don’t feel comfortable. I might be scared. I might even be white knuckling it sometimes. And I’m still here. I’m here for myself and I’m going to go for it.
