How To Know When To Push

Sometimes we need to push forward and sometimes we need to pull back. Tune in as I cover:

  • When is the right time to push?
  • How do we know where to draw the line?
  • When you might want to dial it back.
  • Why self-care is so important to find a healthy balance.

It’s important to know when you need a break and how much pressure is too intense.
– David Wood

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[00:00:00] David Wood: Well, because I think our mind is going to hide anything from us that it thinks is going to be a bit uncomfortable. I would err on the side of pushing ourselves because it’s so easy to gravitate towards comfort. Now I happen to be a bit of a unique case. Uh, my psychiatrist called me counterfeit. And I didn’t know what that was, but as soon as he said the word, I’m like, oh yeah, if I’m afraid of it, I lean into it.

I go and do it because I’m afraid. So for example, paragliding, I’m afraid of Heights. You know, being 3000 feet above the ground, hanging from a piece of canvas is very, very scary to me. So I wanted to lean into it. I was afraid of abandonment. And I still am. So I would explore open relationships and I date a woman.

Who’s dating someone else now for most of us, I think we need to go more in that direction because we’re creatures of comfort. So here’s a great exercise, right? At the top of a piece of paper, what would I do if I was feeling. What would it look like? And you can have one page for business and write down if you’re totally fearless, what would you do?

Who would you speak to? Who would you make a request of? Who would you set a boundary with? Like write it all down. And then on another page, in my personal life with my kids, what would I say? If I was fearless with my friends, my partner in my dating life. So the first step is awareness. Now your question is a great one.

How do we know where to draw the line and when we should do it? Well, I found out by going too far, that’s how I found out. I found out because I stopped sleeping. I would get 20 minutes of sleep and an entire night and for two months, I had a horrible time and a doctor was begging me to take medication.

I said, no, I’m the spiritual warrior. I’m gonna work this out. There’s something to be learned and whatever. So I went deep into it. What I discovered later on was I was going to fight. Beyond my edge, because I was dating a woman who I wanted to marry. She said, run again and get married. But she also had another partner and everything was transparent.

Everyone knew about everything. So it was above board, but I didn’t know that my subconscious was kicking up. My subconscious was saying not safe because I had, uh, you know, I lost my little sister when I was very young, so I have some abandonment trauma. So now I know that. Now, I know if I’m dating someone and she wants to date other people.

That’s not good for my nervous system. That’s too much. So I’ve actually, uh, broken out with amazing women because they didn’t want monogamy. And I’m like, Hey, I just know myself. Now, if you find that you are losing. And you’ll constantly stressed then. Um, and you feel like you are really going for it.

You’re asking Richard Branson to write the forward to your book. You’re calling up 10 prospects a day to see if they want to work with you. If you really, um, pushing yourself, I’m practicing deliberate discomfort and you find that your body is not


[00:03:28] David Wood: well, then you might want to dial it back. I never had permission to do that.

And one friend said to me, once we’re not ready for everything in every moment. So you might have something that’s scary for you that you want to do. Maybe you need to put it aside for a moment. And he gave me the metaphor of lighting a candle and setting it aside until it’s time. And I love that because now.

I have the freedom to choose. Yes. I want to handle that. I’m going to push myself. I’m going to go and do it. I’m going to go and stand up on stage and do a standup comedy gig. Okay. Or, no, I don’t want to do that. The time will come at some point I’m pushing myself plenty. Uh, but the main thing is, start with awareness and then you can work out.

Is this something, do I need a little bit more? In my life, which I find most people are by default. Or am I pushing so much right now? I need nurturing. I need more bubble baths. I need to start saying no to more things. I need to really dial it back and focus and, um, and be nice to myself.

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